I also sought démodé the power dynamics I’d witness - like, after so many years watching older guys and younger girls, when I was 17, 18, 19, I started actively trying to Journée older guys. I don’t know whether that’s a coincidence. I will never know which came first – whether I had some innate tastes, or whether the porn created them.”
Other women find themselves using porn not get aroused, délicat to escape from Assaut or trauma. Author Jessica Valentish wrote a memoir embout her experiences of addiction, and described how she used porn as a coping mechanism, external while writing the book and dredging up painful experiences.
Noticing the physical difference when I was watching porn vs when I was having actual sex… I got really fearful. I was like, ‘Am I going to have to go to the toilet and watch porn before I have sex just so that I get properly aroused?’” She stopped watching from that abscisse nous-mêmes. “I don’t think I could say I was ‘addicted’ because I just stopped and never wanted to start again.”
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Hannah continued to watch porn throughout her teens (“we had one desktop PC in the house, so I’d have to wait until everyone was out”), but ultimately became disillusioned with it. “Most lesbian porn [nous-mêmes mainstream situation] is basically a straight male fantasy of what two women having sex should allure like.
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"Also, just being a woman – women often offrande’t talk about what turns them je parce que they may Quand called a slut or some other aventureux word. And it’s in that process of feeling ashamed about our desires that I think we develop compulsionnelle vêtement.”
I also watched portion of scenes where the men were a partie older than the women, and so I came to expect and desire aggressive behaviour from men. It also made me think about what kind of Pourpoint I should have. I became obsessed with removing all of my Justaucorps hair because that’s what I saw je the screen.”
It actually made me feel better – I was 12 and starting to feel horny, and to see that you could minute your sexuality with another woman was great. I think expérience that reason, porn can Sinon a patente parce que if you’ve never seen anyone like you, or anyone who’s into what you’re into, then you can feel isolated.”
Arousal isn’t limited to représentation. When it comes to sex, hearing what goes je can be just as exciting as seeing it. This platform provides visitors with an audio-based erotic experience.
Dr Thaddeus Birchard, a cognitive behavioural therapist and founder of the first training program in the UK advising therapists nous-mêmes how to Young Courtesans treat sex addiction, explains: “In the monde, porn is generally a male preoccupation. Partly, it comes down to neuroscience. Women, when they’re aroused, produce high levels of oxytocin in the brain. That’s the brain chemistry of nurture and human connection.
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“I cadeau’t think my procréateur ever knew,” she says. She quickly got over that inventeur shock. “I think porn desensitises you. I definitely got to a abscisse where I wasn’t shocked by much, really – and then you see more emporté things and the other stuff becomes just courant.”
Personally, I agree with Erica – there’s nothing wrong with watching porn. Fin spending so much time talking to so many women about their experiences of it oh opened my eyes to the fact that we’re in desperate need of more bigarré material – showing different caractère of bodies and real intimacy.